Psychic Services, Indeed!

T. Renee Richardson, D.D.
Metaphysician
Intuitive Guide

Humorscopes

May the farce be with you!

Please note: Renee is not an astrologer. These scopes are for your entertainment – laughter is the best medicine! Please see Dakine Humorscopes for a bit of island flava. Here’s a little irreverent silliness from Jimmy Buffet to get you in the mood: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wneCa_yIuzg

Aries – Pluto chases Goofy across your stars this month. Put your hand over your mouth when you cough, that’ll help the solution.

Taurus – Astral schmutz has clogged your chakras. Go clogging to increase access the cosmic Vaseline you so sorely need.

Gemini – You’re my favorite! Can you guess why? Follow your heart instead of the fold, and strain no more.

Cancer – Feliz cumpleanos a ti!

Leo – You’re my lion, so roar, already! Stop stifling yourself and let ‘er rip!

Virgo – I don’t care what they told you at the center, yoga and yogurt are not the same thing.

Libra – Call your friends before the next Harmonic Convergence.

Scorpio – Go on a soul retrieval journey before 2012, and reclaim your power from Santa Claus. The Easter Bunny, too, if you’ve got the courage.

Sagittarius – Are you off your meds, or what??? Really, now, maybe a blood test is in order.

Capricorn – How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? If a tree in the forest fell on said woodchuck, where would that sound be heard? Would the wood still have been chucked? Enquiring minds wanna know.

Aquarius – No fever is mo betta. Enjoy the Jacuzzi and let the boys do all the heavy lifting.

Pisces – If you think outside the box, what do you do inside the box? No, don’t tell me…TMI! TMI! TMI! Keep your vision board to yourself.

You may also visit http://humorscopes.wordpress.com for your weekly Humorscopes.